The Buddha’s Philosophy On Sex
Buddha can be
said to have lots of interesting, and sometimes even controversial,
views. After all, a spiritual leader doesn’t have the luxury of just
talking about “fluff” all day long.
They have to
talk about things that’re difficult, things that might rock the boat…and
more importantly, things people can relate to. Buddha certainly wasn’t a
stranger to this.
He understood
that the more accessible and relatable his message was, the more people
would follow his teachings. And one of the most controversial and
fundamental aspects of life- sex- was certainly one of the most
relatable and interesting things to discuss.
Buddha (before he became Buddha) had Sex
Most people fail to realize that Buddha was first and foremost a man.
He was a prince, a husband, and a father…so he underwent all the things a normal man goes through sexually.
This meant as a monk and renunciant, he fully understood what a householder underwent.
But he also ended his sexual desire in nirvana.
The Problem with Sex
The problem
with sex, from a Buddhist standpoint, is not the activity of sex; rather
it’s the desire for sex. You could have sex 10,000 times, and still
want it 10,001. That’s because the activity of sex will never satisfy
the underlying desire.
Desire is never
ending and can never be fulfilled. But nirvana is different. Nirvana is
the cessation of desire, because through that uplifted consciousness,
all other sensory attachments become less important.
Acknowledgement
Is it a sin to have sex for pleasure in Buddhism?
Not at all.
But it is limiting.
It’s limiting just like other desires, because we are capable of so much more.
Desire begins
with the assumption that you are incomplete, and that you must add
something to your life to make you happier- but Buddha taught that you
are already whole and complete, you just have to remember it. He also
taught that you must acknowledge your desires. Be honest with yourself.
No suppression.
Once you learn
to see how desires can’t give you true happiness, they start to lose
control over you. Then you begin to see the path to real fulfillment…and
eventually enlightenment.
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